Not What or Why, but How

How you think influences what you think, and why!

Everything starts with a thought.

That’s right.  Everything starts with a thought.

From the opening of our eyes to taking a step, opening a door, catching a frisbee, typing on your computer, or even going to the bathroom…everything starts with a thought.  Our internal thoughts tell our hearts to beat, our lungs to breathe, and our other organs to function.

How long has thinking been around?

If you go back to the Biblical account of Creation, Genesis 1, you read that God spoke, and creation came into being over a six-day period.  But before God spoke the world into existence, as recorded in Genesis, He THOUGHT! 

And even if you’re not a person of faith, our early tribal ancestors also started with thought, even before there was a spoken language or a written word.  Words and language were also created by thought.  Those thoughts evolved, and became more complex, as mankind morphed into the highly intelligent creature he is today. 

But even today, thousands of years later, everything still starts with a thought.

It’s baked into our DNA. 

We are thinking creatures.

According to research from the Cleveland Clinic, Stanford University, and others, we have more than 60,000 thoughts in a single day. No wonder we sometimes experience fatigue, confusion, or even a headache, at the end of the day. 

That’s a LOT of thoughts. 

But when you dig into the data, it gets even more interesting. 

Somewhere between 90-95% of those 60,000 thoughts are REPEAT thoughts.  That’s right.  We’re thinking the same things over and over again, throughout the day.  Dig a little deeper and you’ll find that around 75% of those thoughts are negative, limiting in nature, or focused on failure.

Throughout the day, we’re thinking negative, limiting thoughts over and over again.  Throughout the day, are thoughts are focused on failure.

Is it any wonder we’re not rising to our full potential in life?

Is it any wonder we keep falling short, limiting ourselves, and missing the mark?

This research gives insight into the immortal words of the legendary King Solomon, echoed by author James Allen centuries later:

“As a man thinketh…so is he.”

If 75% of the thoughts flowing through our minds every day are negative or limiting, and these same thoughts are continually recirculating through our minds all day, every day, these thoughts garner our focus and attention.

And, if our focus is on what’s holding us back, limiting our growth, and only seeing the negative, that, according to Real Life Management, is going to influence our attitude, beliefs, and choices. 

Cause and effect. 

This research, and other studies that support it, gives even more credence to an observation by one of my mentors, Tony Robbins, who says, “Where your focus goes, energy flows.”   

When your focus goes negative, so does your energy.  Your mind sees the world through a negative lens, muting your ability to see and seize the endless opportunities that are around us all the time.  When negativity and failure become dominant in your thinking, it triggers the “fight, flight, or freeze” response in the brain that wants to protect us from what is perceived as danger.

When your mind is filled with negative thoughts, and that’s the primary focus of your thinking, it remains focused on “I Can’t.”

If your attention is on why you can’t, that’s what you’ll believe and that’s how you will act.

It’s a recipe for living your life far below your potential.

But here’s the problem.

We spend up to 95% of our lives on autopilot, simply doing as we’ve always done because we are thinking as we’ve always thought.  We are not consciously aware of what we are thinking, nor why we are thinking that way. 

More importantly, we’re not consciously aware of HOW we are thinking.  Becoming aware of HOW we think will shape what we think and why we’re thinking that way.

One of the Black Belt Success principles I teach in the Black Belt Leadership model is this:

“As you think, you become.  Once you stop thinking, you stop becoming.”

To think, by definition, is to direct one’s mind toward someone or something or to use one’s mind to actively connect ideas.  Ancient Greek philosophy was dedicated to thinking. The words “Know Thyself” were etched on the ancient Greek temple of Apollo at Delphi. 

You can only KNOW yourself when you understand the HOW behind your thinking.

It’s about knowing (educating) yourself, to understand the HOW behind your thinking.  In fact, the Greek word Educa literally means to “go within” to discover HOW your thinking influences your becoming.

Aristotle rightfully said, “To know yourself is the beginning of wisdom.”  Wisdom is the right use of knowledge.  You cannot outperform the quality of your thinking. Uncovering HOW you think is Step One to becoming a better version of YOU! 

Cause and effect.

Choices and consequences.

We think, and then we do.  Thought precedes action. When we improve the quality of our thinking, we improve the quality of our doing and becoming.

As you think, you become.

Once you stop thinking, you stop becoming.

As we improve HOW we think, we improve the quality of our thinking. We become intentional about WHAT we think, and WHY, and in the process, we challenge the status quo to change things for the better in our lives.

We stop going through life by default, simply accepting life as it comes to us.

We truly start LIVING life, and believing we can say, do, and become more.

“HOW Thinking” is about looking within, contemplating what we are thinking and why. It’s about being open to exploring new and better ways to think and solve problems. It’s about challenging and questioning our limiting beliefs and conquering our fears, which are created and reinforced by our thinking. 

If everything starts with a thought, we need to pay attention to HOW we think, as our HOW influences WHAT we think and WHY we think that way.

“HOW Thinking” is (1) becoming AWARE of how the thoughts you are thinking are showing up. It’s about (2) being INTENTIONAL about which thoughts you’re paying attention to and (3) acting upon which thoughts you should be dismissing and not acting upon. 

Let me wrap up today’s lesson with 4 action tips on HOW to think.

First, think about what you are thinking.  Remember, most of us go through life on autopilot, unaware we are thinking the same thoughts, which is driving the same behaviors, and we find ourselves stuck, not moving forward, living a status quo existence.

When you begin “Know Thyself” (to borrow from Aristotle), you start to listen to the dialogue taking place between your ears.  You tune into the conversation you’re having with yourself and begin to:

·         Contemplate – What are you thinking and why?

·         Consider – Are these thoughts serving you well or not?

·         Compare – Are there better, more productive thoughts I should be thinking?

·         Challenge – Why am I focusing on these thoughts if they aren’t serving me well?

·         Conquer – What thoughts do I need to replace to improve the quality of my thinking?

Secondly, you need to think with an open mind.  Much of our “HOW Thinking” was programmed in the early, formative years of our lives. As a result, our thinking is shaped by the biases, prejudices, preconceptions, and beliefs of the influencers who molded and shaped our lives.

Thinking with an open mind allows us to challenge our typical way of thinking and boldly question HOW we think, WHAT we think, and WHY we think that way.  This leads us to the third action step in learning HOW to improve the quality of your thinking, an open heart.

An open heart, as it relates to “HOW Thinking,” is a willingness to learn, grow, and mature. Having an open mind and an open heart requires being purposeful about personal growth.  Remember, we can’t outperform the quality of our thinking, so personal growth is about learning how successful people think, and how they act upon those thoughts.

It’s about having a candid, honest conversation with ourselves about the thoughts we need to focus and act upon, and the thoughts we need to dismiss and not act upon.  When our hearts are open, we are committed to our own welfare and well-being.  This allows us to choose which thoughts best serve our welfare and well-being, and to focus our attention there.

Lastly, “HOW Thinking” requires we think with an open commitment to change. That means we will likely have to not just learn, but UNLEARN a pattern of thinking that isn’t serving us well, and RELEARN a new pattern of thinking that does.  “HOW Thinking” demands that we “Five C’s” previously shared, and then ACT on what we’ve learned and discovered.

Habits are hard to break, but they can be broken.  That’s where open commitment comes in.  It’s an admission to yourself that we CAN improve the quality of our thinking, and in doing so improve the quality of our outcomes in life.

As you think you become.

Once you stop thinking, you stop becoming. 

Stop thinking the same old way you’ve always thought and you will stop experiencing the same outcomes you’ve always experienced. Start thinking in a new, better, and more successful way and you’ll start experiencing a new, better, and more successful outcome.

Cause and effect.

Let me leave you with this thought…

Life is a series of choices and consequences. We get to choose our choices, and the consequences we experience in life happen as a result.  If you don’t like the consequences of your life, you’ve got to change your choices.

And where do your choices come from?

Everything starts with a thought.

How well are you thinking?