Your Character is Counting on You
Character is a moral compass that guides our decisions. It is the bedrock (the foundation) of a life well-lived.
My wife is an accomplished seamstress. She’s sown for New York Fashion Week, National American Miss and Miss USA contestants, TV series, Branson performers, runway models, and (one of my personal favorites) Santa Claus. She also does one-of-a-kind designer clothes for 18” dolls, such as Our Generation, American Girl, My Life As, and other doll manufacturers.
The work she does is elaborate, and often tedious, taking considerable time to design the costume, find the right fabric and accessories to adorn it, and then cut out and piece together these stunning designs with a strong attention to detail. Her clients love the creative flair she brings to her creations. Every single costume she creates is a work of art, unique to each client.
I know little about sowing, even less about fabrics. But after 28 years of marriage, I’ve learned a few things. The weave of a fabric matters, and whether you cut fabric on-grain of off-grain matters in the design of any costume. Certain fabrics will accentuate a specific look or feel that’s important, as the weave can add texture that can make or break a design.
In the fabric of life, there exists an intangible thread that weaves through our actions, shaping our decisions and influencing the course of our journey – this thread is character.
Character, by definition, is the mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual. It’s the way a person thinks, feels, and acts.
Character flows from our values, the non-negotiables in our life. It stands as a beacon that illuminates our path and a moral compass that guides us through the tumultuous seas of life as we face challenges and struggles.
The essence of character is revealed in who you are, both in good times and bad times. It’s been said that the essence of character is living a life of courage and fortitude that is consistent with your values. It’s how you show up, and the reputation you leave behind when you leave.
Again, Character is a moral compass that guides our decisions. It is the bedrock (the foundation) of a life well-lived. It's the unwavering force that shapes our thoughts and directs our actions amid the chaos of the world. Black Belt Leaders understand that part of the personal growth journey is cultivating a strong, resilient character that is consistent with your values.
Life isn’t easy. At times it can be downright difficult. We can only control what we can control. Everything else we can only manage or respond to. Being a person of character is understanding what you can control, such as the choices you make each day, and controlling those things to the best of your ability, consistent with your values.
It’s also learning from your failures, applying what you’ve learned to make better choices, choices that are consistent with your values, and continually striving to become a better version of yourself each day.
Your character is always on display. Your character reveals what you value, the things you’re not willing to compromise on.
It is your responsibility to display it well.
There are three foundational elements to forming and living a life of good character. These three elements are integrity, honesty, and faithfulness.
Integrity is the quality of being honest, having strong moral principles, or moral uprightness. It is the foundation, the very bedrock, of good character. Integrity is the alignment of actions with principles, being congruent with your values, and maintaining a daily commitment to truth and authenticity.
Nelson Mandela spent 27 years in prison fighting for justice and equality for his people, always staying true to his principles. Of living a life of integrity, Mandela noted, “Those who conduct themselves with morality, integrity, and consistency need not fear the forces of inhumanity and cruelty.”
Another historical figure who embodies a life of integrity is Mahatma Gandhi, whose unwavering dedication to truth and nonviolence led a nation to independence. Gandhi said, “Wisdom is knowing the right path to take. Integrity is taking it. Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.”
If integrity is the foundation of trust, honesty is the currency. Trust fosters transparency in personal and professional relationships. It creates a foundation for genuine connections. Abraham Lincoln (affectionately referred to as “Honest Abe”), a figure revered for his honesty, wrote, “Resolve to be honest at all events, and if in your own judgment you cannot be an honest lawyer, resolve to be honest without being a lawyer.”
Despite the many challenges he faced as he struggled to hold the nation together during the Civil War, Lincoln’s character of integrity and honesty served him well. It’s one of the reasons he remains one of our most revered and loved Presidents.
The third pillar of good character is faithfulness. We’re talking about consistency, staying true to your commitments and values over time. Faithfulness is defined as the act of remaining loyal and steadfast. It’s about being reliable, truthful to the facts, and consistent in action.
Martin Luther King Jr.'s enduring dedication to the cause of civil rights, despite numerous obstacles, exemplifies the strength of faithfulness in character. King was willing to take unpopular stances, consistent with his values, and go to great lengths to hold everyone to the standard of equality and freedom that are enshrined in our Constitution.
Aligning character and values allows you to protect what really matters.
When my uncle passed away several years ago, I inherited a freestanding safe belonging to my grandfather that sat in his law office in frontier Fort Smith. That safe was there to safeguard valuable assets, just as the safes in today’s banks do the same. He later moved it to his office at First Federal Savings and Loan when he transitioned from the legal field to banking. Today, it sits in my office, a relic of my family’s past, and a conversation piece when people visit.
Just as we safeguard valuable assets, we must actively protect what we value, the things that are most important to us. Choosing to be a person of good character involves a proactive commitment to preserving what we value most from compromise. Consistency in our character, like a safe, protects our values from the corrosive forces of compromise that seek to erode them.
Understand this, it’s NOT just our actions that compromise our character.
Character can be compromised through actions or inactions. The choices we make have consequences, and when we choose to compromise our character and values, the consequences can be catastrophic. Historical examples, such as Richard Nixon's involvement in the Watergate scandal and Neville Chamberlain's appeasement policy with Nazi Germany, serve as stark reminders of the consequences when leaders stray from the path of character.
Compromised character, like a nuclear explosion, isn’t just a one-time event. In Hiroshima and Nagasaki, the blast from the atomic bombs that were dropped on these cities killed thousands. The radioactive fallout killed thousands more. We saw the same results when the Chornobyl Nuclear Power Plant exploded and radioactive fallout spread through the region.
When we compromise our character, through action or inaction, the results are similar.
The fallout from compromised character extends far beyond individual actions. Complacency, apathy, negativity, resentment, bitterness, anger, fear, guilt, jealousy, frustration, anxiety, and depression form a cascade of negative emotions and outcomes when character is compromised.
As we strive to live our lives as men and women of good character and values, two fundamental questions should guide our decisions and actions.
How does your action, or inaction, affect your character?
Is the choice you’re making a wise decision that is congruent with your character?
The first question reminds us that reflecting on the impact of our choices is essential. Every decision has consequences, and understanding how they shape our character is paramount. And don’t forget that there can be both short-term and long-term consequences to compromising your character.
The second question reminds us that evaluating the alignment of our choices with personal values and character principles ensures that we remain true to ourselves in the face of life's struggles, challenges, and obstacles.
Character, the silent force propelling us forward on the endless pursuit of Black Belt Excellence as a way of life, demands our constant attention and conscious decision-making. Upholding integrity, honesty, and faithfulness builds and strengthens a character you can count on.
Your character is a resilient and authentic foundation for navigating the challenges and struggles you will face in life, and doing so in a way consistent with your morals and values. As you embrace the essence of character, you forge a path towards not just success, but a life well-lived.
Remember, your character is counting on YOU.
Don’t let it down.